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Frosted Flakes
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.
He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger." He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....." he sighed, "...let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."
Submitted by Konifur (31), USA
Christmas Tree
There were two blondes, who went deep into the woods, searching for a Christmas tree.
After hours of subzero temperature and a few close calls with hungry Wolves, one blonde turned to the other and said, "I'm chopping down the next tree I see. I don't care whether it's decorated or not!"
Submitted by Mark Hogan (28), Utaha
The Trucker and The Blonde
A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said,? "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards."
The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?"
"No," the cook said. "Three flat tires mean three pancakes, a pair of headlights is two eggs sunny side up, and running boards are 2 slices of crisp bacon."
"Oh, OK!" said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.
The trucker asked, "What are the beans for Blondie?
She replied, "I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!
FOR ONCE THE BLONDE GETS EVEN!
Submitted by Pepsea (43), Near The Beach, Alberta, Canada
Hot Blonde in Desert!
A blonde a brunette and a redhead went to the desert. They all could bring one thing.
The Brunette brought food to eat, the Redhead brought water to drink.
They turn to the blonde and ask what she brought; she replies a car door so I can roll down the window in case I get hot.
Submitted by Julie Space (),
Gynae Checkup!
A blonde goes to her gynecologist and tells the doctor that no matter how hard she and her husband have tried, she just can’t get pregnant.
The doctor says, "OK, take off your clothes and lay down on the table."
The blonde says, "Um, all right. But I was really hoping to have my husband’s baby."
Submitted by Hilton (23), Manhattan, USA
A Blonde And A Brunette Are Driving!!
A blonde and a brunette are driving down the highway in a convertible.
The brunette knows that she's speeding so she asks the blonde if there's a cop behind them.
The blonde looks behind her and sees a cop and tells the brunette. The brunette then asks if his he's got his lights on. The blonde replies "Yes...No...Yes...No...Yes...No"
Submitted by Michael & Tiffany Taylor (), Kansas
Desires Of Heart!
A Blonde, a Redhead and a Brunette go into a bar. The bartender tells them there is a magic mirror in the ladies room, if you say one true thing you will receive the desire of your heart, but if you tell a lie you will be sucked into the mirror forever.
The Redhead walks in and says, "I think I am the most intelligent woman here" and *poof* a million dollars falls in her hands. The Brunette walks in and say "I think I am the most beautiful woman here" and *poof* the keys to a mustang falls into her hands.
Next the Blonde walks in and says, "I think..." and *poof* she disappears into the mirror forever.
Submitted by Angelina (21),
Island Natives!!
A brunette, a redhead and a blonde explore Native Island. They get attacked by Natives. The Natives say, "We need your skin to make our boats, so either we kill you, or you can kill yourselves with honour." The girls of course chose to kill themselves with honour, so the Natives show them a plate of weapons.
The brunette takes a knife, "I just want every one of you to know that I love my boyfriend very much." And she falls dead.
The redhead takes a dagger, "I just want every one one of you to know that I was about to graduate." And she falls dead.
The blonde goes to the dinner table and takes a fork. She stabs herself all over once, "I just want everyone to know that your boat is going to leak!"
Brunette Redhead Joke Submitted by Robert Vida Guerra (20), Pennysylvania
Define Blonde!
What's the true definition of a blonde?
Redhead with the fire of passion missing.
Submitted by Sylvia Marshal Saint (), Newfoundland, Australia
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