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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?
...
...
A rash of good luck!!
Jokes Submitted by Mario Rocio (), San Fransisco
Top 10 Snappy Comebacks To "Why Aren't You Married Yet"
10. You haven't asked yet.
09. What? And spoil my great sex life?
08. Just lucky, I guess.
07. I'm waiting until I get to be your age.
06. I wouldn't want my parents to drop dead from sheer happiness.
05. I guess it just goes to prove that you can't trust those voodoo doll rituals.
04. What? And lose all the money I've invested in running personal ads?
03. We really want to, but my lover's husband just won't go for it.
02. I don't want to have to support another person on my paycheck.
01. Why aren't you thin?
Jokes Submitted by Rimps Dumas (21), Kansas
Holy Cow!!
cows cows
about cows
talking cows
you cows
kept cows
I cows
long cows
how cows
look cows
Idiot cows
hey cows
read this out loud. say cow before each line. say cow after each line.
Say cow before and after each line.
Now read the first word from each line bottom-top.
Jokes Submitted by "T. H." (), viasky@uniserve.com
10 Humorous Definations!
Women: Person who thinks more with their heart than with their head.
Experience: What you will get while looking for something else.
Zoo: A place advice for animals to study the habits of human beings.
Adam: The only man in the world who couldn't say," Pardon me, haven't I seen you before?"
Dentist: A person who extracts both your teeth and money.
Bald: When one has less hair to comb and more face to wash.
Death: Stop sinning suddenly.
Neighbour: A person who is out of something.
Smile: A small curve that solve big problems.
Kitchen: Final laboratory of housewife.
Jokes Submitted by Abishek Tamrakar (23), Kentucky
Police Story:
Lady calls up police department: Officer, there is a man exposing himself in the next building.
Dispatcher: OK, we'll be right over, lady.
(Five minutes later at her apartment.)
Officer: Which way, lady?
Lady: This way officer, he's still shamelessly baring himself.
Officer: Where is he, lady? I don't see no naked man.
Lady: Oh, you have to look through this telescope.
Jokes Submitted by Tom Hegge (), Plymouth, MN
First Day Coffee
Freddie was eighteen years old, friendly, and eager to do things right. Unfortunately, he wasn't especially bright.
He had just started his first job, as a delivery boy and general go-fer at a furniture warehouse.
His first task was to go out for coffee.
He walked into a nearby coffee shop carrying a large thermos. When the counterman finally noticed him,
he held up the thermos.
"Is this big enough to hold six cups of coffee?" he said.
The counterman looked at the thermos, hesitated for a few seconds, then finally said,
"Yeah. It looks like about six cups to me."
"Good," Freddie said. "Give me two regular, two black, and two decaf."
Jokes Submitted by Kavitha Mundra (23), Illinois
Dumb Mirror!
2 dumb guys came across a mirror 1 day.
guy 1 looked in da mirror and said "I know that face but i cant quite put a name on it"
guy 2 grabbed da mirror and said "U idiot thats me!"
Jokes Submitted by Sean Reeves (),
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