Tuesday, April 19

First Birthday

Baby's look on first Birth-day 

Saturday, April 9

Brave Doggy's Rhino Tale

On an interview for his Rhino chase viral picture, 
Doggy - "That day I was Drunk"

Tuesday, April 5

Aggressive Motorist

A motorcycle police officer stops a driver for shooting through a  red light. The driver is a real jerk, steps out of his car and comes striding toward the officer, demanding to know why he is being harassed by the Gestapo ! 
So the officer calmly tells him of the red light violation. The motorist instantly goes on a tirade, questioning the officer's ancestry, sexual orientation, etc., in rather explicit offensive terms. 
The tirade goes on without the officer saying anything. 
When the officer finishes writing the ticket he puts an "AH" in the lower right corner of the narrative portion of the ticket. He then hands it to The 'violator' for his signature. The guy signs the ticket angrily, and when presented with his copy points to the "AH" and demands to know what it stands for. 
The officer says, "That's so when we go to court, I'll remember that you're an asshole !" 

Two months later they're in court. The 'violator' has a bad driving record with a high number of points and is in danger of losing his license, so he hired a lawyer to represent him. 
On the stand the officer testifies to seeing the man run through the red light. 
Under cross examination the defense attorney asks; "Officer, is this a reasonable facsimile of the ticket that you issued to my client ?" 
Officer responds, "Yes, sir, that is the defendant's copy, his signature and mine, same number at the top." 
Lawyer: "Officer, is there any particular marking or notation on this ticket you don't normally make ?" 
"Yes, sir, in the lower right corner of the narrative there is an "AH," underlined." 
"What does the "AH" stand for, officer ?"  
"Aggressive and hostile, Sir."  
"Aggressive and hostile ?"  
"Yes, Sir. 
"Officer, are you sure it doesn't stand for asshole ?" 
"Well, sir, you know your client better than I do."

*How often can one get an attorney to convict his own client* ?

Monday, April 4

A Perfect Man

*A Perfect Man*

- wakes up at 5 am everyday
- exercises everyday
- makes his own bed
- cleans his room
- works sincerely
- does not touch alcohol
- helps in the kitchen
- does not indulge in night life
- is always punctual
- prays daily
- reads
- hits the bed at 9 pm sharp.

These men are found in Central jail.

Cheers

Wednesday, March 9

Sunday, February 20

Grow Balls Quote

Famous woman quote: 
Balls are weak and sensitive! Grow vagina if you realy wanna get tough. Those things take a quite a pounding!! 

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